more suggestions

From the nominees for the 2009 One Book One New Orleans.

And from book reviews in the Tulanian:

• Brothels, Depravity, and Abandoned Women: Illegal SEx in Antebellum New Orleans (Judith Kelleher Schafer)
• Plenty Enough Suck to Go Around: A Memoir of Floods, Fires, Parades and Plywood (Cheryl Wagner)
• New Orleans Cuisine: Fourteen Signature Dishes and their Histories (Susan Tucker)
  

book suggestion

Zeitoun by Dave Eggers - coming out now (Sarah saw a NY Times review; I saw it in a small newspaper in Oregon while here).

I'd definitely be interested in reading it - especially once out in libraries.

Heidi: Back When We Were Grownups

I'll admit it - I'm not a big fan of fiction and haven't been for a number of years.  It's darn hard to get me pulled into a novel and care about the characters (the key notable exception is the The Secret Life of Bees and almost anything by Alexander McCall Smith).

And this was true to form - it was hard to get into, and I complained to Sarah.

But the complaint was premature, and I ended up enjoying it quite a bit.  Good thought provocation.  

Most of us, especially as we age, at times wonder about the path not taken.  I try very hard to not make any decisions that I will later regret and instead am happy with how things are, but it is not abnormal to think about other possibilities.  What if?  

Here is a woman (SPOILER ALERT) who had a life planned out for her, which she dumped to jump into another life that pre-existed her.  She married a man with children and was fully wrapped into the craziness of their lives.  More a matriarch than a stepmother.  But the man she married died (mysteriously, perhaps suicidally) only six years later - so in her mid 20's she's widowed and raising four children and running a family business in their home.  The setting of the business is critical and a deft stroke by the author.  

I found all the characters annoying at times but not unlikeable.  Instead, this was a realistic portrayal of almost every family I've ever known well - with warts and all.  I particularly liked the use of Peter, the stepson of her stepdaughter.  

The whole Will storyline was a fantastic reminder of my own recent resolution: no recycling men.  We break up and move on for a reason, and going back doesn't work no matter how we try.  I thought it compelling, how hard they both tried but it was prophetically (and maybe pathetically) doomed.  Poor Will.

There were several passages I wanted to allude to here, but I read on the plane and didn't mark them ... 

But I think of the silly cliche "Fake it until you make it" and it has an element of truth.  Rebecca faked her happiness and exuberance, but that was who she really was.  I liked the ending quite a bit.

But why did she and Zeb never get together?  I found that puzzling.  

I loved Aunt Ida.  And the mechanic so happily married to the crazy lady?  Fascinating characters, all of them.  The plumber or electrician shouting out advice and invited to birthday parties - or the woman with the wonderful hats who helped serve at times but was invited as a participant at the most meaningful occasions.  Tina staying at Rebecca's house and breakfasting together.  Life and relationships are messy and I liked how authentic that is.  I think a message was that laying out the plans most carefully - as Will did - can lead to rigid dissatisfaction. But being open to the moment and the crazy can lead to an exasperating yet fulfilling life.  And I liked that message indeed.  Like a Flannery O'Connor story without the pathology.  Rebecca is exasperated with Min Foo's short-lived marriages and has her mechanisms for coping (such as refusing to admit she knows where Hakim is from - and didn't Hakim seem to eagerly be such an outstanding father?), but she doesn't make a big production of disapproval.  They all squabble and bicker but still show up on Thursday evenings.  

So, it ended up being more enjoyable than I expected at first, and I would read more by Anne Tyler.  

The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo

I didn't have any expectations when I picked this library book off Amy's table, I thought, but I did.

Such as (SPOILER ALERT):

• the dragon tattoo would have meaning or at least the girl with the tattoo was a most central character.  Instead, we're left to wonder about her and her mysteries, making it clear this was a first of a series
• there wouldn't be extreme sexual sadism.  But there was, twice.  Almost gratuitous but not quite.  Shocking and disturbing nonetheless.
• that the author wouldn't sometimes give extremely specific details - fixating on software descriptions, sandwich descriptions, etc.  And his settings?  Glossed over all those details indeed.  

When I was young I went through a mystery novel phase ... sometime after my Louis L'amour and Zane Gray phase, and before my foreign classics phase.  And in that phase, this book would be pretty good.  But now?  Meh.  I find fiction pretty darn boring, even when it compels me to read further.  It was a pretty good story with surprising twists and turns, and few too extreme to dash my willing suspension of disbelief.

And I don't want to be a conspiracy theorist, but the author died at 50 of a massive coronary?  Seems suspicious indeed, especially after his extremely clear descriptions of poisons and other murder possibilities.  He was a journalist, extremely vocal against the extreme right, and it doesn't seem that unlikely that they would have eliminated him.

OK.  Maybe i don't care if I'm a conspiracy theorist.

Anyhoo, this is a pretty good vacation read and it's a fun ride.  Just not earth shattering.

book suggestions

The Flowers by Dagoberto Gilb.

AND ... all these titles that Gail & I found that interested us.

On Wayward Women.

Hello ladies!  I thought I would finally sit down and share some thoughts on Kim Sunee's book and When We Were Grown-Ups. 

On Trail of Crumbs -  It was quite refreshing to get Heidi's perspective on the book because I wondered if I was missing something!  The book seems to be generally lauded and I thought that I may be the only one that found Kim Sunee confusing and difficult to follow.  Inasmuch as I admire any woman that follows her own star it can become irritating to hear a litany of complaints and general indecision.  I do not know how much of this was a result of  the editing (Heidi made a good point that the editors may have been trying to create a villain in Olivier which would affect the flow) or the stream of conscious story telling.  I found it difficult to really get into the story because it seemed that the entire novel was a series of vignettes and nothing more.  After every chapter I was left with questions - Why does she not speak up for herself?  Why is she so ambivalent about her lover's child?

I was told once by a close friend that there was a danger to "living in your head."  As a generalization I think that the statement is not very helpful but there is something to being too metaphysical about your life.  I saw this tendency in Kim.  At one point Olivier says to her, "You just don't live in this world do you Kim?"  I thought that this statement was quite loaded but she never  responded to it.  I wanted to know throughout the book why she seemed so melancholy and whether she recognized that tendency in herself and wanted to change it.  Heidi said that she must have wanted some understanding because of her meetings with Grignon but I got the impression that these sessions left her more confused than ever. 

I do not meant to suggest that Sunee conjured up things that were not there.  Her lover does indeed seem to be controlling.  Routinely entertaining 30 plus guests is exhausting and what intelligent woman does not want her own life, her own purpose?  So while I understand her desire to branch out on her own, there seems to be a fundamental lack of self-awareness that I found baffling.  Heidi mentioned the same irritation with her not stating the obvious about her background with the multiple clues that she is not fully Korean.  

I should note that it is always easier to see the proverbial trees when it isn't your forest.  It's easy to judge her and I think it was a brave thing for her to do - to write a chronicle of her life during a time when many of us are confused and wandering (hence the wayward) but I think that she left us with no account of what she learned from her actions.  I believe that she tried to capture what she was then and what she thought then but I kept waiting for Sunee to tell us how she feels about that period in her life NOW but it never came.  Heidi said that she has read her writing now and finds her much less irritating - I hope this is the case. 

While I certainly had some grievances with the book I'm glad I read it.  In part I took it as a cautionary tale of what can happen when one is too indecisive, too unsure about yourself and what you want.  It demonstrates how easily the years can pass while you remain with a nagging sense that things aren't as they should be but make no effort to change them.  I also related to the pain that comes from wanting to undo what you've done but being at the mercy of another person's life decisions as well.  The scene in which she tried to get Ollivier back was especially heart-wrenching.  Like my girl Alanis Morisette says, "I recommend getting your heart broken to anyone."

But on to greener pastures!  Our new book is a work of fiction and explores an always fascinating proposition - "What if I had chosen that other road?"  I am enjoying it so far and can't wait to hear what you ladies thought!

-S

Manchild in the Promised Land by Claude Brown

I'm reading this book because once I got in a spat with Virginia Sheriff, back when we were still speaking to each other. He got a little self-righteous when I gave him a hard time for being a former English teacher and not knowing who Cyrano de Bergerac was. He gave a list of books that he taught to bash my Euro-centric ideology.

Of course I'd read most of the books on the list, only this one not - and when I asked him for more books he blew me off. Oh, so maybe I'm at least as well-read on African and African-American literature? Not so self-righteous now, mister?

So, I finally started this book while on the plane and I really like it. It's thinly fictionalized autobiography - I don't know the fiction and the bio, so it flows together seamlessly.

Claude Brown, born in 1937, grew up in Harlem with parents from the South. What I know about Harlem about that time was the Harlem Renaissance, especially Langston Hughes, which painted a beautiful, interesting picture. Brown paints a different picture altogether - of violence and desperation and criminality and torn social fabric and survival. It's fascinating.

But a few points I especially note (I'm maybe halfway through).

• His views on homosexuality, how people just are and he has no problem with it, are refreshing indeed.
• He seems pretty conflicted about women and I find his thoughts fascinating. He may have been intolerable as a young playa but I get the feeling he still treated most women as people.
• I'd be very interested to know about birth control used then - or not. Especially all the prostitutes - how did they avoid pregnancy?
• The devastation of the community wrought by heroin is really well-developed and makes a lot of sense. It seems to parallel what I hear from people remembering the height of the crack epidemic in New Orleans.
• He didn't really embellish what made him decide to get out, what made prison not seem inevitable after his hard living. I think this illustrates how usually it's not one thing or one person that makes another person decide to get out, but a confluence of factors making it a reality.

Well, much more to say, but I want to go back to reading while waiting for Gail! (Oh, and for some reason I can't access the blog from M's computer - it's blocked for some reason. I can see there are comments but I can't read them! I'm not ignoring commenters - I'll get to them as soon as I can.)

Book #2: Back When We Were Grownups by Anne Tyler

So, we picked a new book which I hope others like. And if it doesn't appeal to you, that's fine too - recommend the next book!

We couldn't get a sense of the book at all based on the covers, but the first page pulled us in.
Once upon a time, there was a woman who discovered she had turned into the wrong person.

She was fifty-three years old by then - a grandmother. Wide and soft and dimpled, with two short wings of dry, fair hair flaring almost horizontally from a center part. Laugh lines at the corners of her eyes. A loose and colorful style of dress edging dangerously close to Bag Lady.

Give her credit: most people her age would say it was too late to make any changes. What's done is done, they would say. No use trying to alter things at this late date.

It did occur to Rebecca to say that. But she didn't.

I like reading how people figure out who they are and their place in the world, as long as they aren't whiny.

So, let the reading begin! Sarah bought the book and I picked it up at the library and will read on my travels. Hopefully we like it!
***
Just discovered it was a made for TV movie - will have to check it out.

meeting: Trail of Crumbs

So, Sarah and I met to discuss the book.

Well, we met and caught up but never got to talking about the book so she came along with me on my appointments and errands. Sitting in the Blue Cross office talking about Trail of Crumbs was pretty funny.

Sarah will have to speak for herself, but I think we both had problems relating to and caring about the narrator. She was whiny and self-obsessed. The writing style also turned us both off - too jumping around at places. I wish she'd put in more poetry and such, if she thinks of herself as a poet.

Sarah was very good about keeping us on the book, though I was distracted and brain dead. I see many more fun book talks to come!

So, it was fun to see Sarah and talk books, and funny enough one of my errands took us next door to a new-ish used book store/fish store! Perfect for you, Gail! Seriously, half the store was aquariums and the other half used books. Pretty darn funny. Anyway, I recommend all people in the New Orleans area head to Metairie Road's Brier Patch Book Store. He has a nice selection, and I think it's hard to find used books in New Orleans.

Sarah and I spent quite some time reminiscing over books we've loved - and both of us frequently find we are the only people who don't like what everybody else loves. Which is good to talk through. Sometimes I know for me, it's just the mood I'm in - if I'm in the emotional space to commit to a book or not.

And, we chose our next book! I'll post that in a new post. Hopefully it's easier to get in libraries.

Heidi: Trail of Crumbs

"Where I Am": Ah, such wondrous delights of food. When I read things like this I know that I cannot stay in New Orleans forever - because while we have wonderful food, we lack this sort of fresh and healthful bounty. Finding local, organic produce is difficult if not in my own back yard. Oh, and lemon verbena - I love it. (Saw a recipe for it in ice cream and I might make it in my new ice cream maker! A related food!)

I don't like her too much to start. I hope I like her more as the book progresses, because she's about my age now but here she's 23, so I do hope she grows up.

Wild peaches? Oo la la! Those sounds wonderful indeed! I have no idea what these wines are. Clearly I cannot move to France because I would rather have water to wine any day.

Chapter II: "the trinity" p. 9 - ah, yes. This woman was indeed raised in New Orleans. Mirliton, okra, and sassafras? I have yet to master file. These foods are so comfortable, even Cafe Degas just down the street from me on Esplanade. Very comfortable.

But then on p. 24: "Some people build their houses up high, hoard batteries and water. There are also levees to protect from overflow. But I've never quite understood how it is we are to survive seven feet below the level of the sea. I don't want to board up windows or have duct-taped views of the world. I'm restless, too, and all I long for is solid shelter." She nails it. Nobody exhales until hurricane season is over. Every document I've been retrieving of late for different purposes, I think, "Be sure to take that when you evacuate." I have to know when I buy anything that it may well be destroyed. I gutted enough houses here to know that on every level. I know what destruction looks and smells like, and I know it's in my future. And as much as I love this crazy, soulful city - the sensible part of me has issues with that.

***
OK, I'm on p. 80 now and still waiting to actually like her. We would not be friends. She seems boastful about moving around a lot and I'm like "Lady, you went from New Orleans to Florida to Europe. A lot? Let's compare passports and past addresses. Beat you!"

And she reminds of K2 (remember our big Korean friend, Gail?) who was so lost, so dark because he was 1 1/2 generation Asian-American. And I understand that it is difficult to come from another country and to feel an outsider but you have the benefit of two worlds and you want to complain only? I have always been an outsider as well and never fit in any place, so looking different isn't it, dude. You choose to feel different, and that can empower you rather than crush your spirit. You make choices.

And that's what I feel with Kim Sunee - she's making choices about how she portrays people. She shows all these negative sides rather than a whole picture. And she was an adult when she met Olivier but she acts like some passive blog - that all these things happened to her. What? And if she didn't like something, then she needed to speak up and stop blaming people years later for her inability to take responsibility for her own happiness. Like she says things like they made love until she was sore and raw - I mean, what is that? Taking something wonderful and complaining? If you wanted to stop, you just say you want to stop. Sheesh! But if you didn't want to stop, then don't complain 15 years later for hopping on that ride and not getting off. She could have said, "We made passionate love until we were exhausted and spent" or something such that I would find far less offensive. Look, I find men who take advantage of women to be despicable - but I find women who allow this to be not much better.

Yeah, still not liking her much at all, and I need to rush through the rest of the book because I don't very much like her company and I am extremely particular with whom I spend my time. Whine whine wine (ha). But I like the recipes!
***
More I find annoying: her use of French. She throws in very simple phrases which I fully understand, but they are gratuitous and not systematically used. Not all readers do understand French so it blocks their understanding without adding anything.

Her frequent allusions to L'Occitane seem like name dropping and gossip. Fine, be clear about whom you are speaking if you feel you have to right to tell another's secrets and your perceptions as Truth. But why the constant name dropping? To remind us that you didn't just shack up with some older man but a wealthy, powerful older man? It still seems icky to me because of how she presents it, and even ickier when she keeps bringing it up. I do believe that love can genuinely exist across vast cultural and age differences, but it can take special people to get over it.

When her parents came to visit, I was relieved she spoke of them positively because she rarely seems to, or give them any credit for giving her a good life. But then she overreacts to her mother's questioning. It is very legit for a parent to ask if their child is going to get a job or career. I understand that taking care of Olivier's house is a full-time job, but it doesn't seem like anything she's really happy or fulfilled with (she had just been writing about how she wasn't) - so why wouldn't her mother ask? To condemn that shows her lack of maturity. And come on - she's shacking up with an older guy who is still married - not exactly a great, stable career. I certainly would want more for my daughters.

I'm on p. 168 now and keep wondering why she doesn't think of the obvious when people keep telling her she doesn't look really Korean. Why does she not consider that her biological father was white or a different type of Asian? This would complicate her story line, surely, but it seems an obvious consideration and I'm wondering why she doesn't bring it up. Maybe she will later.

I went to her blog and Facebook page, and I'm glad I did. She is not unbearable there. Maybe just because I haven't read a book for fun in so long, I had too high expectations. And books are so hacked up by editors - I will cut her more slack. I like her reading list on her blog. Shows more about her than all her whining about being spoiled by a rich man.

p. 299 is my favorite scene - at the shop they find still open, and the owner says she has vegetables across the street. Sure, it's a small town and she asks after his mother, but I still find it touching. I love when people share garden produce - it's a very special gift indeed. A double gift - from the soil and from the gardener.

Trail of Crumbs: First book!

Gail and I have decided: Trail of Crumbs by Kim Sunee is our first book!

This thanks to an endorsement from my friend Jane:

Finished a great book recently called Trail of Crumbs by Kim Sunee. Is in biography section of book stores. She was a 3year old child abandoned by her mother in Korea (along with a younger sister). Both were adopted by a couple from New Orleans and came here to live. Kim learns to be a good cook from her cajun grandfather, then after college has travels thru Europe (Sweden, France, Italy) where she continues to learn about cooking along the way. Really interesting. At the age of 23 she becomes the girlfriend of an older Frenchman (the founder of L'Occitane). She has been a judge on Top Chef in the past.